Sunday, August 29, 2021

I have entered the world of Octogenarians!

It was celebration time again. One year ahead of  my 80th birthday and one day ahead of my Calender birthday. Though  I turn 79 only today and enter  the world of Octogenarians,  the celebrations took place yesterday- a Sunday. It started with my getting the best birthday gift of my life from my family. I opened my mail box yesterday morning  to find a mail from my daughter Sowmya attaching a book containing greetings and matching photos from my close family, extended family, old friends including a few walking friends. It was full of encomiums which I don`t know if I deserve. But I accept the sentiments expressed  with all humility. I had planned for a big get together  at GNC but that had to be cancelled due to restrictions on the number of guests allowed ( I promise to have that party later when the restrictions are totally relaxed).Instead I hosted a breakfast at Matsya restaurant in Gandhi Nagar for my walking friends whom I meet every morning. This was followed by a lunch at my residence in Sastri Nagar for close family in which my  resident grand kids Thavam and Bakthi and the non resident grand daughter Nila were VIP guests. The food from Eden restaurant which my son Balaji had arranged was delicious. I broke my resolve of not touching the spirits for the last seven years by having a glass of wine to celebrate the special occasion.

 In the evening Sowmya had arranged for a zoom meeting, anchored by my son in law RU,  at which over two dozen members of  my close and extended family conveyed their greetings to me online. Going down memory lane is always interesting. I thoroughly enjoyed interacting with every one. On the whole it  was a good start for another year which I hope to celebrate every day, God Willing!

My first out station trip after eighteen months- a unique experience!

When my daughter`s family  decided to visit Kumbakonam to offer prayers to her in law`s family deity, Uppiliappan, she agreed to take  me with them. I was more than delighted because I had been wanting  to visit Balaji temple in Tirupathi but was happy that instead I was getting an opportunity to offer prayers at the temple of Uppiliappan considered elder brother of Balaji. The visit turned out to be unique because my son in law RU had booked our accommodation in a home stay facility located  in the Agraharam of a  village instead of a modest star hotel we usually stay in.  The village was Konerirajapuram, about 25 kms away from Kumbakonam famous for the ancient  `Uma Maheshwari samedha Nataraja temple`. The facility was booked through the `Airbnb ` app.

The last few kilometers to the facility was through narrow winding  roads with green fields  on either side. The drive was pleasant and beautiful. When we reached the spot I was surprised to see a typical village house  with sloping tiled roof with a big `Thinnai in front`. We entered  the house to find the facility having  all the things that you would  find in a typical village home , as seen in many Tamil films. The owner had ensured that the guests experience  a life in a typical village home by retaining all the items found in such homes like a big swing ( Oonjal), an easy chair,  a grandfather clock which announced time every hour and many more.   

The three bedrooms in the home were very basic  without  attached toilets  which  were located in the back of the home. There were two toilets out of which  one  had a western style commode and the second one the Indian type. The other improvement was instead of the typical open wells used in the olden days, piped water supply was available through taps located in bathrooms and other strategic locations. There was also a simple Geyser in the bath rooms for those who prefer hot water for a bath. There are  no air conditioners in the house . Instead  Air coolers are  provided on request. Fresh linen and towels are also provided. Though WIFI facility is available , there is  no TV in the house. The care taker  Kumaresan ensured that we  were served delicious  home cooked  South Indian vegetarian meals from a family providing this service in the village.

After some rest,   post lunch consisting of a three  course meal, in the evening we visited the Uma Maheshwari  temple in the village followed by a visit to Sarangapani and Ramaswamy temples  in Kumbakonam. When we returned by 8 pm, hot idlis and Rava Upma were waiting for us for dinner. Though the beds were not very comfortable, it was a peaceful night that we spent at the end of the first day. 

The next morning after an early breakfast consisting of Idly, vada and hot pongal we checked out of the home and decided to visit Nachhiar temple and Uppiliappan temple  before returning  to Chennai. Standing before the imposing statue of Lord Uppiliappan  for  more than 10 minutes , I was lost in my prayers, without any crowd to push me around. Thanks to the fear of the pandemic, in spite of relaxations there was hardly any crowd in all  the temples.  I was happy that I had a darshan of a famous deity in my first outstation trip after eighteen months.

Though we had no time to go around  the village I learnt from the care taker that the village had about 2500 households out of which 400 houses were located in the Agraharam around the temple. Out of these only 40 are occupied now and rest of them were lying vacant used by the owners settled in other cities or abroad visiting the village during festival times. The home we were put up was 150 years old and is owned by a gentleman  settled in Japan, who had bought the property from the descendants of the original family. It was a big  house which had the main entrance on one road  and the back exit gate located on  a parallel road behind the home.  The new owner had demolished a portion of the house on the rear to create a small garden in which fruits and vegetable are grown now. 

Away from the hustle and bustle of a city or a  town it was an interesting experience staying in a typical village home and enjoying the peace and quiet  of the place. I learnt that the facility cost us Rs 5900/- for hiring the whole house for  one night for four people including all the meals and other supporting services. Ideal for people who are not too fussy in spite  of  the place not having  all the facilities and comfort they take for granted in a star hotel,  but would like  to have a  new experience.

 

Saturday, August 14, 2021

My 11th book in 12 years-

 `The Search and other stories`- my first attempt at a translation job

My 11th book in 12 years is out. It is a translation  of selected  short stories of Dr.J.Bhaskaran (JB)  from Tamil to English.  Based in Chennai .JB is a practicing Neurologist and Dermatologist whose articles/stories have been published   in popular Tamil Magazines  and also posted on his  Face Book page. He has so far published  nine books in Tamil - 3 medical, 4 general essays and 2 short story collections. He is a rising star in the world of Tamil literature.

When I decided to take up my next book project of translating a Tamil book into English I chanced upon a collection of Tamil short stories by JB  titled ‘Thedal’.( Search) The stories in the book, covered a variety of subjects with different settings, different characters, some serious and some humorous—but all of them with some message. Doctor was more than delighted to give me permission to translate any 15 stories from the book. As this was my first attempt at a translation job I started translating the first story with great trepidation, as I was worried if I would be able to get the correct translation of all the words and phrases in English. I did not have to worry. The ubiquitous Google Search which has replaced every  available dictionary/ Thesaurus in any language came to my rescue. When I sent the translations of two selected stories to JB, his response was more than encouraging..

 

You may wonder what is my credential for translating a Tamil book into English. In my student days in Bombay, where I studied in a Tamil medium school until 8th standard

I was a Tamil fanatic. An active student member of Bombay Tamil Sangam, I was an avid reader of all the popular Tamil weeklies and books by well-known authors of the time. I also tried my hands at writing short stories and plays in Tamil. I was active on the Tamil stage in Bombay donning character roles. But all this was behind me when I took up the demanding advertising career and left Bombay for good in pursuit of better opportunities in Delhi and Chennai where I am settled since 1974. Though I completely lost touch with writing in Tamil, I continued to keep in touch with the Tamil literary world by being a regular reader of the popular Tamil magazines.

 

In the meanwhile, the success of my autobiography in English published in 2009 paved the way for my taking up writing as a serious hobby post retirement. Very early in my evolution as a writer /author I had decided that I will try and cover all genres of writing. So far I have covered six genres: autobiography, rural marketing ( an industry), essays, history of an association, short stories and  novel.

 

As the seventh genre of writing, I chose  a translation job because of my comfort level with both English and Tamil. Besides I also had the lessons I learnt from my good friend (late) Charukesi, a well-known bilingual writer of his time, who had translated my autobiography into Tamil.

 

This book titled `The Search and other stories`  has a Foreword by R.Seshasayee, Vice Chairman of Hinduja group. Following is an extract:

 

“There is something that is very simple and elegant about Dr J. Bhaskaran’s short stories- like the  murmur of a small brook; like a modest nandiavattai flower. Like the strumming of a thampura, like   an unpretentious, tasty milagu rasam that only your mother could make. Every story has an uncluttered theme, characters being built up just to the point where they are ready to carry the story on their shoulders without losing speed or straying from the storyline. Not surprisingly, the stories leave you feeling good and satisfied

A word about the translator. Language needs to remain unobtrusive in a translation, never coming in the way of the narration. Like the right measure of salt in your sambhar, unnoticed, yet contributing significantly to the taste. R. V. Rajan, being a seasoned hand at writing, achieves this effortlessly.”

The book was informally released at the end of  a small event held  to commemorate the release of the 90th Anniversary Special  of Kalaimagal, the popular Tamil monthly.

The book is published by Creative workshop, designed and printed by Compuprint.. Priced at Rs 150/- the book is available with the author ( bhaskaran_jayaraman@yahoo.co.in) and from me. It  will soon be available on Amazon.

Like a student awaiting the results of an examination he/she wrote, I now eagerly await the response from readers to my first translation job!

 

 

Sunday, August 8, 2021

Grand Children – best gifts one can get in life!

I consider  Grand parenthood as the greatest promotion one can get in life. There cannot be a greater gift than getting a grandson or a  grand daughter. I had the privilege of becoming a grand father at the age of 54 when my grandson Arul was born. I remember the day vividly. I was busy in the office in discussion with my Secretary, when I got a call informing me of the arrival of a  baby boy - my first grand child through my eldest daughter Kavitha & RU. I literally jumped with joy shouting `I have become a Thatha!` Arul had arrived  in this world seven  weeks before my silver wedding anniversary. I had a grand function planned at Savera Hotel. The invitation went  in the name of Arul which carried a line at the end `No gifts please. My grandparents say  I am the best gift they got for their Silver Wedding Anniversary`

Since that day 25 years ago I have been blessed with five more grand children. Three grandsons  and three grand daughters including the two late arrivals – my resident grand children  3 years old Thavam and 5 month old baby doll Bakthi. The lovely kids of my son are keeping me entertained and spreading joy around.  Though I must confess  that at 79,  I don`t have the energy that I had 20 years ago to indulge them physically. It is always good fun when all my children and grand children visit my home for a family get together. We had one such occasion three days ago.  A lunch get together in honour of my second daughter Sowmya and her family visiting us after nearly two years thanks to the restriction imposed by the pandemic. The occasion also provided photo ops. Attached is a photo of my grand kids taken on the occasion. I missed Arul as he is now based in San Diego in USA ,doing well in his fist job that  he got after completing his Masters from the Carnegie Mellon university.

While the four senior grand kids, all talented in fields of their choice,  have grown into mature kids with their heads on their shoulders- I am sure the latest arrivals also will follow suit judging by the way my son Balaji and daughter in law Tulse are bringing them up. Please join me in  blessing  all my grand kids a bright future.

Tuesday, July 27, 2021

Prabha`s landmark birthday today

Prabha would have turned 70 today (27/7/21).  Though I miss her physical presence I  continue  to live with Prabha in my virtual world. As I have always said, instead of mourning her death I have been celebrating her memory every day for the last eight years. She was my life partner for 40 years. She more than lived up to my expectations over the years (I still don`t know if I lived up to her expectations) Befitting our Indian culture, she helped me look after my family, which included my aging parents. As I was busy with my career and involved with several voluntary organizations, she did a great job of balancing  her duty to the family and her other interests.


A fast learner, she overcame several of her initial inhibitions to become a wonderful partner, good daughter-in-law, lovely mother, doting grand mother and above all a great homemaker! In the last two decades of her life, she  acquired an identity of her own as a writer  and as a socially active person. She walked  tall in our social circles! I was  certainly proud of her achievements.

Though she lived to see the four grand children through my daughters Kavitha and Sowmya  arrive in the world it is a pity that  she is not there to enjoy the two bundles of joy-  3 years old Thavam &  5 months old Bhakthi- our resident grand children born to my son Balaji/Tulse.

In celebration of her memory I am involved with many activities to identify and bring to lime light talented women writers under the auspices of  Prabha Rajan Talent Foundation. In the process  I am  trying to spread happiness around to the best of my abilities. Hope that keeps my dear Prabha`s soul happy!



 

Saturday, July 24, 2021

Travails of a Vegetarian ………

 I discovered the problems faced by `pure vegetarians` when they are travelling abroad during my first ever trip overseas in 1976; a five week trip to five countries under a travel grant from Round Table India. While I had no problem in getting South Indian vegetarian fare in Singapore, Kuala Lumpur and Colombo, I had a problem when I visited cities in Australia & New Zealand as a part of the trip. I remember visiting various restaurants with my hosts.  Whenever I ordered for a pure vegetarian dish, the response from the waiter would invariably be `No Problem ,Sir`. And every time I would be served a plate of  king sized boiled potatoes, tomatoes,  or carrots arranged neatly on the plate surrounded by celery & cabbage leaves. Occasionally the potato will appear in the form of finger chips on the plate. I was  expected to add pepper & salt to the dishes . I would also add tomato & chilly sauces to make the bland vegetables palatable. When this happened where ever we went to eat, I started shuddering at the thought of having meals in restaurants. Looking at my disappointment, some of the kind hosts with whom I was staying,  offered to cook  special Indian meals at home with some tips from me. I can never forget the delicious Vegetable Pulav which my Australian host cooked for me in Perth without any help from me.

 Another experience happened  during my first trip to Europe to attend The AGM of WOCO( World Council of Young men`s services club to which Round Table India is affiliated)  held in Stockholm in 1980.

 I was attending  a  ‘House party’ on the first night of our stay in Stockholm, at the residence of a Swedish couple. The lady of the house was forewarned about the Indian guest who was a strict vegetarian! Since vegetarianism as a concept was non-existent in Europe those days, the lady had, in her wisdom, decided to steam cook an artichoke, a vegetarian delicacy and garnished it with some leaves which she proudly placed before me on the dining table. I was deeply disappointed. Throughout the train journey, I was living on buttered vegetable sandwich packed with lettuce and cabbage leaves with hardly any tomato pieces. Suddenly seeing something (I had never seen an artichoke before in my life) which looked like a mini tree was shocking— especially because I was very hungry and was looking forward to some home cooked meal. Seeing the disappointed look on my face, the lady approached me and whispered, “I can see that you don’t like what I have cooked for you. Don’t worry, I have some cooked white rice. Can I serve you that?” I literally jumped out of my seat with joy screaming, “Please. . . Please”. When the lady brought a plateful of white rice, I mixed it with all the hot, sweet and sour sauces available on the table and ate like a glutton!

 I am sure my family   would certainly not have approved of my behaviour at the dining table that day. I couldn’t care less! Hunger knows no manners! After a hearty meal and with a burp, I told the lady that it was the best meal I had after several days.

 On my return journey from Stockholm I joined a Danish Tabler, who was driving to Copenhagen.  Next day as part of the day long sightseeing tour I had undertaken, the tourist bus stopped at a City Centre for the tourists to have their lunch. I remember going to McDonalds considering it would be safest for me to get a vegetable burger. When the burger came, I was shocked to find

a suspicious looking red patty along with the cheese slice and was horrified to realise it was a salami piece (prepared from beef). I returned my burger telling the attendant that he had mistakenly given me a beef burger. Twice I was given similar burgers. A local Pakistani gentleman who was watching me then revealed, “There is no concept of vegetarian burger here. If you are very hungry, I suggest that you remove the salami piece yourself and eat the rest of the burger.’ I reluctantly followed his advice with an extra plate of French fries, feeling guilty that I was committing a sin by doing what I did especially on a day when back home I would have been celebrating `Avani Avittam`- annual sacred thread changing ceremony!

 After that experience, on all my foreign trips, especially official trips where I was attending meetings or conferences for a couple of days or more  I began to carry some podis ( dal powders), pickles, Vattha kuzhambu paste, banana or potato chips etc. As soon as I checked into a hotel, I would rush to a nearby super bazaar to buy some milk, yogurt, bread, cheese slices  and bananas and stock them in the refrigerator in the room to provide me a back-up meal for lunch  or breakfast,  if needed.   In the evenings, if there were no official dinners, I would order a plate of white rice from room service  and  have a sumptuous , three course South Indian meal in my hotel room.

 I remember once I hosted a dinner for six South Indian delegates in my room. The delegates from Andhra were excited beyond words when I placed on the table a bottle of `Avakkai( Mango) pickle` and also Ghee which I had carried with me during that trip. I found this more economical than hunting for an Indian restaurant when I am abroad and spending a lot of dollars on a taxi  for a vegetarian  meal which cost only a couple of dollars. And remember, those were the days when we were allowed  only a limited foreign exchange. So every penny counted!

 I must confess that over the years I  became an `Eggitarian` or `Eggarion` as they say,  so that I could  have at least a sumptuous breakfast in most of the Hotels where I stayed.

 The world has come a long way since my early experiences of travelling abroad. Today vegetarianism   has caught up in a big way all over the world. Getting a decent vegetarian meal in most of the restaurants abroad is no more an issue.  Italian restaurants serving delicious cheese and vegetarian Pizzas also offer a good alternative to vegetarians when they travel abroad. Besides opening of Indian restaurants in many cities of the world are helping a staunch vegetarian to survive without having to become an `Eggitarian` like me.

 

Saturday, July 10, 2021

Who is a Female Chauvinist?

What do you call the demanding and bullying type of wives, with an air of superiority, who treat their men with little respect. Female Chauvinists? This term would be particularly apt for the wives of the ever growing breed of henpecked husbands in India, thanks to education and empowerment of women.


There are two types of henpecked husbands. The difference is in the way the wives treat them. While in the first instance the husband is treated like a slave, in the second instance he is treated like a ‘kid’ by the wife. In both the cases the wives  are the dominant partners.

In the former case the husband will await instructions from his wife for everything. She will dictate the time when he can get up, have his coffee or his meals, what he can or cannot eat, when he can go out, by what time he should be back home, etc.etc. When guests are visiting she will use him as her able assistant – make him do all kinds of errands. She will monitor his conversation with the guests. Openly admonish him if he is off track or says something which he should not have. He has to be at her service every waking moment.

The second type of henpecked husband is one who is not allowed to do anything. Poor chap doesn’t even know how to light the gas stove, leave alone make a cup of coffee in the morning.

I remember a friend’s wife proudly declaring to a group of friends at a party, “You know, Ram doesn’t know anything; he is like a baby. He doesn’t know what medicine to take at what time. I have to literally spoon feed him”. My dear friend Ram far from being embarrassed was beaming with a smile on his face, proud of his dominating wife! His job is only to be the breadwinner in the family, handing over his entire salary to his wife and waiting every morning for the small change she would  give him for his day`s expenses. In the evening he had to account for the generous (!) pocket money she had given him.

I know of a cousin who could not have a free conversation on the phone with anyone, without his wife overhearing him on the parallel line and interjecting with her own comments from time to time. It was embarrassing for the callers but the husband was quite happy his wife was steering the conversation. While we may pity such husbands, they seem to thoroughly enjoy their henpecked status.

What happens to such husbands when their wives predecease them? I have seen a few cases where the guys are totally shattered. Just like what happens to women when their dominating husbands suddenly pass away without keeping them informed about their bank accounts or their assets and liabilities etc. They feel like sailors on a rudderless ship in a turbulent sea. Some recover quickly, take charge of their lives and convert their new found freedom into an opportunity to lead a new life. Others languish in depression, unable to bear the loss of the dominant partner and a few follow their spouses to heaven so that they can serve their master in the other world too!

Thank god I was neither a  henpecked husband nor a male chauvinist but considered as a `women`s libber` in a man`s world.