S.Muthiah- A tribute to a dear friend

My good friend of 45 years and a well wisher is no more.  A writer, author, columnist, a Heritage activist and chronicler of political and cultural history of Madras,  passed away this afternoon after fighting a losing battle with cancer. He was 89. What is remarkable and inspirational is the fact  that until he had the last ounce of energy, he was working; either editing his favorite fortnightly Madras Musings which he had founded more than 25 years ago or churning out his weekly column for The Hindu or working on one or more of his book projects.

I can never forget Muthiah for the role he played in my becoming a writer/author post my retirement.  I had retired as the CMD of my company Anugrah Madison in 2007 at the age of 65  and had already started penning my memoirs- in fulfillment of a life  long dream of wanting to write my autobiography. I had completed a couple of chapters when I happened  to attend a meeting of the Madras Book  Club  where Mr Muthiah was speaking on the topic `Biography as History`. He was appealing to the audience consisting of many retired bureaucrats, business men and professionals  to write their memoirs, `not to become famous authors but to  leave behind for posterity a  “social history”; to  provide insights into the life, happenings, values and mores of a city or a community or a profession at a certain point of time.` He said that history is not just about kings and kingdoms but about people. His talk gave my book a focus..

 My autobiography titled `Courage My Companion` was released at a well attended meeting of the Rural Marketing Association of India held in November,2009.  I was delighted to have Mr.Muthiah  receiving the first copy. The excellent response I got for the book and my style of writing encouraged me to write essays on a variety of topics. My first article titled `The Ubiquitous Velaikari` appeared in the Eve`s Touch monthly of which Mr.Muthiah was the consultant editor. I sent an article to Madras Musings which was also published by Mr.Muthiah. Not only did he publish my articles but he would also urge me to go through the corrections he had made while editing them. He hated the use of too many adjectives  by writers. In the last 10 years,  hundreds of my articles on a variety of topics  have appeared in several local dailies and magazines.  I have also published nine books covering five genres of writing during the same period. I owe a deep debt of gratitude to Mr.Muthiah for my evolution as a writer/author. Apart from being my mentor Mr Muthiah had been a genuine well wisher.

Though a very friendly person he can be brutally frank when he talked to people. He was known for his rigid stands on issues. While he was fond of sports, he did not care much for music or dance. Inspite of his disinterest  in Carnatic music, on my special request, he attended   the first  carnatic music performance  of my  11 year old grand daughter Uthara at Tag Centre in December,2013 and wrote encouraging words about her performance in his column in the Hindu. His blessings meant a lot to my family.

He visited my home with his wife Valli to offer condolences when I lost my wife to cancer in January,2013. I did not realize at that time that Mr.Muthiah himself will become a widower when he lost Valli, his wife of over 40years,a few months later.- an irreparable loss in his life. The only time I have seen him break down  was when I went to his house to offer my condolences. I also broke down,because I know what it means to lose a life partner.

I had got closer to Mr Muthiah in the last few years.. What impressed me most was his never say die spirit. Inspite of his ill health for the last few years, he continued to work hard. He never displayed any self pity nor questioned `Why me?`. He  will drag himself to his desk and continue to work on some assignment or the other. Work for half an hour and rest for one hour.  Incredible man!

Whenever some negative thoughts enter my mind because of health issues, I think of Mr.Muthiah and his positivity. I get recharged. He was one of my role models in life. Like the legion of his friends and students I will also miss him a lot. I am sure, wherever he is he will continue to guide me to think and act positive in life.

May his soul rest in Peace!

Andaman…. A `Kalapani` transformed into a tourist paradise

Andaman for long was associated with the word `Kalapani`.  Because it was a penal settlement where the British kept dangerous criminals and revolutionaries in solitary confinement and inflicted untold miseries on them to break their will. Besides the sea surrounding the islands was deep blue in colour which was also a reason why it was called `Kalapani`.

Andaman is today slowly emerging as a popular tourist destination. With lovely and alluring beaches, dense forests and endless variety of exotic flowers and birds, the pristine islands of Andaman & Nicobar shimmer like emerald in the Bay of Bengal.  Andaman offers a choice of activities for all those seeking some adventure during  their travel. The sea around the Islands offer opportunities for  water sports like Scuba diving, Snorkelling, Sea walking, Coral safari on a Semi submarine besides trekking, fishing and kayaking . No wonder that Andaman is referred to as the `Diving Destination`!

I was a part of a group of Rotarians and families on a three day trip to this Union Territory located in the Bay of Bengal.  A 135 minutes flight from Chennai took us to Port Blair, the capital of Andaman & Nicobar Islands, an archipelago of 572 islands out of which 38 are inhabited islands connected with Port Blair by road or sea. Until mid-seventies the islands were notorious for tribals who were Cannibals . Some of these Jarawa and other tribes are still found in Nicobar Islands where entry to tourists is prohibited.

We had many pleasant and unpleasant experiences.  Let me start with the unpleasant experience which almost derailed our trip. On our way to the hotel from the airport, when our  bus neared  the designated Hotel-Western Park   located in a by lane in the heart of the city, our collective hearts sank. Not only was it not a Resort Hotel but was like a `Hole in the wall` facility meant for tourists looking for budget hotels. Besides, as we entered the Hotel lobby, an unbearable stench activated respiratory problems of many in the group. Checking into the rooms brought us more shocks. Many in the group discovered cockroaches and rats for company. The rooms were very small with even smaller beds for twin sharing. While the size of beds might have suited the couples in the group, it was certainly not an interesting prospect for a Sexagenarian like me to climb over my Octogenarian friend, with whom I was sharing the room, every time I had to get out of the bed. Fortunately the three day programme was not only interesting but also helped the group bond well and enjoy the trip.

The first item post lunch on the first day was a visit to the famous `Cellular Jail`. It  consists  of  two rows of three storied structures consisting of 698  dingy cells measuring 13`5`x 7` with a ventilator of 3` x 1` nearly 10` above the floor at the back and having a small iron grilled door in front.  A conducted tour of the place was truly awe inspiring to many visitors!  But senior citizens and the disabled might find the long walk around the Cells a bit taxing. Attending the `Light & Sound Show` held in the evening on the spacious courtyard of the jail  is a must for all visitors. Listening to the stories of the atrocities perpetrated on the prisoners by the British masters was a moving experience. Unfortunately the Voice over which was in Hindi, (available in English on alternate days) not understood by many in our group, put several of them to sleep. I also found the overlap of voice with the overpowering background music and sound effects, disturbing.

Before attending the show at the Cellular jail, we had visited the Corbyn`s  Cove beach within the city. As a person who lives very close to the beautiful Elliots beach in Chennai, I did not feel excited about this beach.

The second day morning saw the group reporting at the Pier at 7.30 am for a Boat ride to Havelock islands, which boasts of several beautiful beaches and beach resorts. Every one must carry an ID card ( aadhar)which is checked by  security  at every stage until we boarded a boat with three air conditioned decks and  a seating capacity of 300.  It took us 135 minutes to reach the Havelock port. During the trip, apart from the mandatory Hindi movie on view, the management of the Boat had  also organised for  loud music on the top deck. Many youngsters were seen dancing to kill time because one can easily get tired of watching the sea.

On landing at the port, we were whisked in a bus to Radha Nagar Beach, which is a 30 minutes ride through lovely greenery. I felt that the Radha Nagar beach fully deserved its reputation as one of the most beautiful beaches in the world. Unlike the long stretches of Sand in Madras beaches the Radha Nagar beach is surrounded by beautiful trees, many of them forming canopies giving the beach a lovely ambience. The towering Palm trees and  the  greenery all around make it a sight to behold!. Many in the group went for swimming  or went on speed boats while senior citizens like me in the group were content relaxing on the several benches on the beach savouring the wonders of nature. After a quick meal at a restaurant near the port we were back in the boat for an uneventful return journey when most in the group were found catching up on their sleep .

The third day began with a lot of excitement because we were going to visit  two important tourist spots. The first  was the historic Ross Island  which was used as an Army  headquarters by the British where the officers lived a life of luxury.  In 1942, during  the second world war, the Japanese Army  drove  the British  out of  the island. The Government  of India which took over the Island has managed to make it a tourist friendly place where visitors can see the ruins of the Club House, the Church,  the Swimming pool,  Tennis court, Commissioners bungalow, Troop`s barracks, Bakery and other such facilities used by the British officers that  are maintained as Museum pieces. A well laid out tourist path covers all the facilities within an hour. There are battery operated cars to take the disabled and senior citizens around the facilities. The Island is kept clean and it is a pleasure walking around the facilities . There is, however, only one Cafeteria  catering to the visitors with limited items. At 10.30 am we could not get a cup of coffee because the vendor had run out of milk!

North Bay Island, the next destination on our agenda,  is known for its water sports facilities like Scuba diving, Snorkelling, Dolphin Rides, and many more. Scuba diving, at Rs.3,500 for a 30 minutes experience , is expensive. But a few youngsters in the group  decided to give it a try. They  had to wear special swim suits  and gears provided by the sports operator. After they  passed  the mandatory health check up they were accompanied  by a  trained guide to ensure safety. Undoubtedly it was a memorable experience and those  who successfully completed the trip came back beaming with joy holding a certificate of participation and  photos taken under water. While no one went for snorkelling, a few opted for viewing the Coral reef by taking the Semi submarines which provides a panoramic view of the coral reef through the glass windows surrounding the basement of the boat. Unfortunately, due to sudden change in the weather conditions this trip was cancelled by the operator. When we asked one of the Boat operators, ~who decides to cancel the trip ?`, his spontaneous response `` Ooperwala` floored us.  On probing further he said that while it was God`s will to change the weather conditions, It was the owner of the Boat who gave instructions to cancel the trip, in the interest of the safety of the tourists.

While the predicted bad weather did not materialise into heavy rains it had made the Sea very rough. The thirty minutes of the return journey on the choppy seas  when the boat was swaying heavily found the whole group screaming with fear and excitement. Fortunately nothing untoward happened and we reached the shore safely in time to have a quick visit to a shopping mall to buy some mementos. A  Bon fire without the fire arranged at a  hotel hall saw the group relaxing and   enjoying their  last night in  Andaman.

`All is well that ends well` is the saying that came to my mind when we were returning to Chennai next morning, with pleasant memories of our trip. Andaman is  worth a visit in one`s lifetime! But please plan for a five day trip if you want to experience all the available activities.

For those who are planning a trip to Andaman I would like to give the following tips:

1 While deciding on the Hotels don`t go by the beautiful pictures of the hotels & facilities featured on the websites of the hotel. They can be deceptive. Better to check with people who have visited the place earlier. Ideally deal with a local travel agent directly.

2. Three days are not enough to fully experience Andaman and its beautiful beaches & activities. Plan for atleast a five day trip. For more details visit the very informative website on  Andaman

  3.  Spend at least two days in Havelock islands which  boasts of  many lovely locations.

  4. Carry enough cash to enjoy many of the water sports activities because they are expensive. ATM`s are available for those who don`t believe in carrying too much cash.

 5. Most of the islands do not have good restaurants . Food becomes a problem on your visits to  different islands. Pre packed lunch is one solution I would recommend.

 6. Please remember that you are not allowed to take away any sea shells or even a grain of sand from the beaches of Andaman as a memento. The activity is strictly prohibited. At the airport there is a special security check up to catch people who are breaking this rule.

7. Majority of the population is Bengali  closely followed by the  Tamils, Telugus  and others. Hindi is the common language used by every one including all the shop keepers.

 8.  December to May is considered the best time to visit Andaman, especially if you are interested in diving activities.

9. Don`t forget to carry an identity card like Aadhar or Driving license because you need it at every security check before boarding a boat. Only children below 2 years are exempted.

10. Carrying an umbrella or rain coat is recommended to protect oneself from sudden rains.

Indiscretion- R

The other day I was having dinner with my children and grand children at a restaurant. The waiter was taking his own time to bring the order.  While everyone wasfeeling restless, I decided to act.  I shouted at the waiter who was passing by and admonished him for delaying our order.  In turn, I got admonished by my children.

While my son was trying to wave his hands and  asking me to take it easy, my daughter was gritting  her teeth when she whispered, ‘Don’t shout, appa’

I realized that I had performed an act of indiscretion.  It is also known as; imprudence, rashness, thoughtlessness, etc.  All of us indulge in acts of indiscretion some time or the other in life.

I have a friend who is notorious for making indiscreet remarks about people, often in the  garb of cracking a joke,   invariably hurting those people and sometimes leading  to embarrassing situations.

Once, at an office party, I was having a serious conversation with a friend about another colleague who was having problems on his family front.  We were joined by another friend midway.  Within a few minutes he said loudly, ‘Oh, you are talking about Ram whose wife has run away with his driver’.  It was a totally uncalled for and indiscreet  remark.  I felt most embarrassed when I realized that others nearby had stopped their conversation and were staring at us.

Comparing one sibling with another, shouting at children infront of their friends, pulling up a staff member in front  of his colleagues, cracking a joke in a group when it is involved in a serious discussion, the list of indiscrete acts performed by people  is endless.

I think as we grow old, the number of indiscrete acts we indulge in also grows.  Sometimes  it could be because of the choice of words we use, the manner in which we speak or simply by forgetting to follow established  norms. Your children are your best critics in this respect. Today`s children waste no time in pointing out your indiscretions  where as during our younger days we just had to suffer silently because we never had the courage to speak up to our parents.

The most common form of indiscretion that old people, especially old men,  indulge is in `passing wind` with a loud noise,  nonchalantly in public .  They are least concerned about the embarrassment they might be causing to the people around them particularly  their near and dear ones in the crowd.  The interesting point is such people are not even aware that they are performing an indiscreet act. There are a few, however, who grin sheepishly after performing the act, when people around  stare at them.

Some readers might even accuse me of being indiscrete for writing  about this common phenomenon.  It is a topic which never fails to tickle the funny bone in people. If some readers of this piece  are smiling, I know they will pardon me  for this act of indiscretion.

This article has appeared in the March,2019 issue of Dignity Dialogue

Madras Girl for the U.S.President

A few weeks ago, when Kamala Harris, an African- American   announced her entry into the 2020 US presidential race, there was a lot of excitement in India, because of her India/Chennai connection.

When she was first sworn in as a Democratic senator from California in 2017, she became only the second African-American woman to serve in the Senate. Kamala was also the first woman elected as District Attorney of San Francisco and the first person of South Asian descent to become Attorney General of California. Those are just a few of her inspiring firsts. But this article is not about her achievements but about her India/Chennai connection.

Kamala`s mother, Shyamala Gopalan, was the daughter of P. V. Gopalan, a Tambrahm, who was active in the Indian independence movement and then became a high-ranking civil servant who fought against corruption. Later he acted as an adviser to newly independent nations, including Zambia. Her mother, Rajam Gopalan, who was  married at 16,  grew into a self-assured woman who used her position in the society  to advocate for less advantaged women. During the 1940s, Rajam would drive around in her Volkswagen bug with a bullhorn, telling poor women how to access birth control. “My grandfather would joke that his wife`s community activism would be the end of his career,” Kamala wrote in her book, Smart on Crime. No wonder Kamala has activism in her genes. Her mother liked to recount the time when Kamala , then a toddler, was fussing and, when asked what she wanted, cried out, “Freedom!”

As a child, Kamala frequently visited her extended family in the Besant Nagar neighborhood of Chennai, where her grandfather had settled down post retirement.. Kamala  grew up going to both a black Baptist church and a Hindu temple.^[She has one younger sister, Maya , a former Vice-President at Ford Foundation who was a  part of Hillary Clinton's election campaign.  

Kamala and Maya, were raised by their Indian mother, in a black neighborhood during the Civil Rights movement, which helped shape Kamala`s  African American identity.

It seems Kamala`s mother  was a very strong woman, very hardworking, very intelligent. After doing her graduation in home science in Delhi, she went to America for higher studies in 1957-58. She got her Masters and  a PhD. Later she became  a scientist who worked on breast cancer. She had done a lot of research on cancer and was quite well known in that field. She met Dr Donald Harris, a Jamaican American and married him in 1963. Kamala was born in 1964, the first grandchild in the family.

Kamala`s  parents divorced when she was seven, and her mother was granted custody of the children by court-ordered settlement.^[ After the divorce, her mother moved with the children to Montreal, Québec, Canada before returning to USA to pursue a career in cancer research.

Kamala graduated  from Montreal's Westmount High School in Québec after which she  attended Howard University in Washington, D.C., where she majored in political science and economics.  At Howard, Kamala was elected to the liberal arts student council as freshman class representative and  was also a member of the debate team.  She  returned to California, where she earned her Juris Doctor (J.D.) from the University of California, Hastings College of the Law, in 1989. She was admitted to the State Bar of California in 1990. Thus began a legal career in which she was to excel in whatever job she undertook and become a trailblazer.

Though Kamala was born and brought up in America, her mother Shyamala had  inculcated in her South Indian culture and values. Shyamala  was a true South Indian in all aspects and loved South Indian food. That is why her daughters also like South Indian food. Kamala  believes in going to the temple because her mother believed in it. According to her extended family in Chennai, Kamala is what she is today because of her mother.

Kamala  married Douglas Emhoff, a Jewish attorney from Los Angeles, a few  years ago at the age of 49. This was  her first marriage while he has two kids from his previous marriage. The extended family from Chennai was there to celebrate the day. As she got married to a Jewish American who is also a lawyer, there was a Jewish ceremony as well as an Indian ceremony with mangalsutra  etc. T he wedding was a family affair with  her  close family and  friends attending it. There was special vegetarian food for the guests from India  at the feast as Kamala  knew that her family members from India  ate  only vegetarian food.

Kamala has another connection with Chennai; with Lord  Ganesha at a temple   in Adyar. Before the primary a few  years ago, she  had called her aunt and said, 'Chithi, please pray for me, break coconuts at the temple.'

So Dr  Sarala Gopalan, her mother`s younger sister  who is a consultant at Voluntary Health Services in Chennai ,  broke 108 coconuts at the  Ganesha temple where  Kamala`s mother had once been a committee member when it was first set up.

After she was elected attorney general, Kamala  called her aunt and said, 'Your coconuts worked, Chithi. For every coconut you broke, I got 1,000 votes.'

Dubbed as the "female Obama", the press is already touting her as the potential first woman President for the 2020 election. If she becomes a leading contender for Democrat presidential nominee she may once again choose to foreground her black identity to appeal to the coalition that voted Obama to power.

Let us wish Kamala Harris, with her family`s roots in Chennai, all the best in her dream of becoming the First `Indian-African-American` Woman  President of USA.

This article has appeared in the Madras Musings Issue dt. 1-15^th April,2019.