Return of my baby after 52 days!

 It was on 11th December 2023 that my car was towed away to Cars India Ambattur Works, where all the cars affected by the recent cyclone were being attended to. I did not then realize that the works had 350 cars to repair and restore and my car was one of them. Though I was promised that my car would be back in 30 days, it has taken Cars India, Ambattur, 52 days to return the car, and that too after persistent & often frustrating follow up with the concerned persons in charge of my car.

I am a strong believer in the Maruti brand for their maintenance-free cars and good resale value. Have also had the benefit of their excellent after-sales service through Cars India, Adyar branch for the last 30 years. Starting with Maruthi- 800, I have owned an Esteem, Swift, Ritz, and now an automatic Ceelerio over the years. As an old customer of Cars India, I thought I would get a preference in dealing with my case. That did not happen.

It is interesting that in the last 40 years of my stay in the current house water used to enter my car every time there was heavy rain and there was flooding around the house. I never had a problem starting the car after the flood water receded. Though the water level was slightly higher than usual, I decided not to try and start the car because of the message from insurance companies going Viral on WhatsApp, warning car users of the severe damage to the Engines, if the car was started in a flood situation. When I contacted the Adyar Branch, the person in charge also advised me not to take the risk. He arranged for a towing service to tow my car to their Ambattur works, which cost me Rs 8000. I felt sad to see my car being towed away for the first time in 40 years. It felt as if a near and dear one was being taken to a hospital in an Ambulance.

I am very disappointed with the way that my case was handled by Cars India Ambattur. While I can understand that there was a huge pressure on them dealing with hundreds of Cars, I was upset that I was not being given the correct picture when I started following up with them after 30 days. False promises and wrong status reports were being given to me. Unfortunately, the work was so far away that I had no desire to go and physically check the situation.
Anyway, I am happy that the car is back with me. Needless to say, I was as happy as one feels when a near and one returns from a hospital after a successful surgery. After going through the final bill I realized that the car was not very badly damaged. In hindsight, I feel that the Car could have been repaired at the Adyar branch and I would have got the car without having to suffer the undue delay by the Ambattur works. That is the price I had to pay for overreacting to the viral message on WhatsApp.

The positive side of the story is that I got used to the idea of living without a car. Something which I intend to do when I go to Coimbatore. I am not taking the car with me but will use the excellent call taxi service available in CBE.

I must thank all my friends and family for providing me the ` CAR SEVA` whenever I needed it. God bless them!

I am moving to Coimbatore

  29 years in Mumbai, 3 years in New Delhi, and after 50 years in Chennai I will be moving to Coimbatore in March 2023 to lead a life without responsibilities

I thought I would share with you the reasons for my decision to move to Nana Nani (Phase 4) a Senior Citizen Home in Coimbatore, though   I already have a good support system in Sastri Nagar where I am staying with my son`s family surrounded by siblings living in the same housing complex.

The idea took root in my mind after I wrote the article titled `Home away from Home- a Life without Responsibilities`  for which I visited several Senior Citizen Homes and interviewed scores of residents in such homes. Most of them were  NRI parents with their children staying abroad. But many of them were also seniors whose children were staying in Coimbatore or other cities. Still, they opted for the Home because of the independent life without day-to-day responsibilities such Homes offered. I found most of them were very happy with their life in such Homes.

After Prabha passed away in 2013, I was enjoying the independent life I was leading, looking after myself and offering whatever physical help I could offer to others.   In the last couple of years, the aging process and the consequent steady decline in my health with all kinds of aches and pains have made me worry about the possibility of my becoming dependent on my children and a nuisance value. I miss Prabha now.  She could have taken minute-to-minute care of me if I was unwell as only a life partner can do, without my feeling guilty about it. This has created an anxiety syndrome in me. My spirit is still willing to take on challenges but the flesh is becoming weaker and weaker.

Today well-run senior citizens' homes offer an excellent alternative life for those who are financially independent and who are living alone leading an insecure life. They also provide reliable facilities for dependent parents living with children in nuclear families when they are not in a position to provide any help to their children because of a lack of energy and stamina.  As I find myself with my two little resident grandchildren. They are fun but I find that I can`t run after them or cope with their boundless energy.

Some children appoint full-time caregivers to look after their dependent parents. This is not practical for everyone due to space constraints and other reasons. Many of the senior citizen homes offer assisted living facilities within the community without the children having to worry about such parents on a day-to-day basis. Though at present I don`t need such care, I am looking ahead and being prepared for any eventualities.

The second reason is the condition of the beautiful Home I built 42 years ago. Age is also catching up with the Home which is witnessing many cracks endangering the security of the family. Though I  have seen water entering the ground floor of my independent home where I stay almost every year when it rains heavily, the recent experience because of the cyclone in Chennai has broken my endurance limits. I don`t want to live in the house to face the nightmare of another flooding of the house. With the possibility of my siblings also moving out for the same reason, and the families going for a redevelopment of the property, I  wanted to clear the way for my son so that he can look at plans without having to worry about me.

Why Coimbatore when there are many Senior Citizen Homes in and around Chennai? Better weather and the fact that my younger daughter Sowmya is now settled in Coimbatore who could be a first respondent in case of a health emergency, have influenced the decision.

I want to make it clear that the decision is based on my habit of thinking ahead and looking for out-of-the-box solutions to some of the problems I faced in my life. I  may still come back to Chennai if I am not happy with life in the new Home as the lease of the apartment is for 11 months only. Besides I will keep visiting Chennai whenever an occasion demands my visit. So friends in Chennai, do not bid me goodbye, yet

How to make at least one person happy every day

Since I retired from my job at the age of 65, I have discovered the great joy of making other people happy. When people around me are happy I feel happy. In the last few years, I have publicly declared my latest policy to make at least one person happy every day. Friends ask me, how do I do it? The answer lies in my nature to help others. In all my life, whenever anyone approaches me for any help I would never say `not possible` but say, `I will try`. Thanks to the goodwill I enjoy among my large number of friends and contacts, I can connect the person seeking help to a person who is in a position to help. In 80% of the cases, the problem gets resolved making the person grateful to me for helping. It could be anything from a request for school admission, seeking a job, looking for an alliance, a medical condition, a problem with a government department, seeking a donation, a loan, or many other reasons people seek help and advice from friends. This is one way to make people happy but how do I practice it every day? It happens by instinct.

Godman Sri Sri Ravishankar of Art of Living fame advises his millions of followers to keep smiling and create a positive feeling for you. I try to follow this advice and do not hesitate to greet anyone I meet during my morning walks or in any public places. I make it a practice to call or visit senior citizens who are living alone and looking for someone to talk to. Offer them any help they need then. I know of a nonagenarian friend`s wife who is a voracious reader. I regularly supply her with new books in exchange for those she has already read. The reward I get for my good deed is to be fed with some delicious snacks she lovingly prepares, once in a while.

Every year I buy the special Diwali issues of some popular Tamil magazines and circulate them in rotation among a few of my friends, all senior citizens. They look forward to this unusual service from me with great expectation. I feel happy when they are happy.
I am also prompt in appreciating people for their little and big achievements. A handshake, a pat on the back, or even a simple word of appreciation makes people happy. During my walks in the mornings at Bessy ( Besant Nagar Beach front in Chennai), I come across families with small, cute kids. Occasionally I stop and pet the child and tell the parents “ A smart kid. He will go places in life. God Bless”. The happiness on the face of the proud parents is to be seen to be believed.

Then there are scores of other small acts you can perform that make people happy. Like having small talks with service providers like electricians, plumbers, and mechanics who come to repair equipment. Enquire about their background, their families, or the simple act of offering them a glass of water or a cup of tea. I also derive great joy when I see the surprised and happy look on the faces of call drivers, auto drivers & vendors when I pay them more than what is due to them. I can go on. If giving becomes a habit it will surely generate a lot of happiness among the recipients of your kindness, and you will be happy that you are leading a purposeful life instead of just existing in the world.

 

 

  

 

Remembering Prabha on her eleventh Anniversary

Instead of mourning her death on 5th January 2013 I have been celebrating the memory of my life partner for forty years through Prabha Rajan Talent Foundation (PRTF) activities which I started in her memory. On the 10th Anniversary event last year, a new idea of presenting the PRTF Role Model awards was introduced and two deserving senior citizens were honoured. I released  an advertisement  in the 2023 Diwali issues of Kalaimagal and Ladies Special magazines which briefly highlighted  the achievements of three women who decided to pursue their passion for writing, late in life, like Prabha.

 On her 11th Anniversary, I promise that I will continue with the activities of PRTF as long as I am mentally and physically fit. Om Sai Ram.
---------------------------------------------
The attached photo of Prabha was taken in Kashmir where we had a- Childhood dream come true holiday- as she called it. We returned from the holiday on 25th April,2012 and she was diagnosed of terminal cancer on 5th June,2012. She passed away on 5th January,2013, exactly seven months after the diagnosis of colon cancer.